Which barre-bie are you?
The group fitness stereotype series continues… Here’s a list of 14 classmates you’ll run into in a Lotte Berk / barre class. While you’re up-an-inch, down-an-inch-ing, look around – you may see some of these folks! Which one are you? (I’ve been many of them…)
1. The student who’s shaking-like-a-polaroid-picture (above).
Once it starts, it’s not stopping. We have ALL been this one at some point. “If it’s shaking, it’s WORKING!”
2. The pregnant chick.
Not just any pregnant chick. This woman appears to be in her 8th month, carrying quadruplets, and yet every part of her body other than her midsection is more toned than yours. AND – carrying what appears to be 50 extra pounds of baby, she is STILL pulsing lower than you.
If I said my prayers every night, one of them would definitely be “to look like hot pregnant barre class lady when I get knocked up.”
3. The spot stealer.
Liam Neeson has something to say about this, too (click here).
4. The unintentional-spot-stealer newbie who is blissfully unaware of wrath that will soon be inflicted upon her.
Good lord. She is about to get stabbed with the stare of death.
5. The woman who seems extremely disgusted… at her own reflection.
She is focusing intensely on herself, with a look of ultimate disdain. I imagine her inner monologue to be something like this: “REALLY, ASSHOLE? You REALLY think you can’t pulse lower than this?” This woman is also often C-level at a fortune 500 company. Or will be in the near future.
6. The newbie.
Under 5 classes anyone? White tube socks are basically the Lotte Berk “Cone of Shame”.
7. The oh-shit-I-packed-socks-from-the-wrong-studio-and-the-teacher-is-gonna-hate-me student.
Yup. I’ve been her many times. Teachers: don’t give me the stink eye! It was a mistake!
8. The looking-up-to-heaven-for-help water-skier.
“Please, baby Jesus/Allah/Buddha/Scientology Aliens, let me get through this set of thighs.”
9. The overzealous hip thruster.
It’s me, I admit it. I love to thrust. This song comes to mind.
10. The brave man.
This is a woman’s world/ But it wouldn’t be nothing/ Nothing without a man or a boy… isn’t that how the song goes? …But let’s be honest, this man is a genius.
11. “She’s frosted”
This woman’s ring is so large that she probably only requires one hand weight for the arms section.
12. The woman who is under the impression that her Lulus are opaque.
Until she goes into “chair”… crack city!
13. The “before” picture.
She’s a few (or more than a few) pounds overweight. This is my favorite barre classmate, because seriously, this class is so much harder for her than it is for us… MAJOR respect. I’m inspired by her, and wish I could say so without offending (I’ve concluded that there is no way to do this, so I just give a creepy smile and go on my way). I hope she keeps coming back!
14. The “after” picture.
Comes in all shapes and sizes – success means something different to everyone. Barre class has been a “gateway drug” to fitness for so many women I know. AMEN.
Which one are you? Did I miss any? Comment below!
For this article : http://blog.rateyourburn.com/blog/post/2012
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